Alright I'm going to admit, I AM very disappointed with most of my trial marks. I AM very disappointed at how I went all year long in most of my subjects, but at the end of the day, I realised, that even if I'm beating myself up about it now, there's really nothing I can do to change the fact that I did poorly. So, instead of moping and being all depressed about something that we can't change now, we should endeavour to be more optimistic and tell ourselves that a) we ARE going to ace the HSC exams, b) internal marks don't really matter anyway and c) internal marks are also going to be scaled up RIGHT?????

While I know deep down in my heart, that there is like a 0.00000000000001% chance of me getting a 99.70 ATAR, it's always good to have a little hope that you just might get that. Yes, I know, the higher your expectations, the higher your disappointment will be. But hope is a healthy way to destress and really understand that, getting a bad ATAR doesn't mean you're going to be a hobo for the rest of your life.

Now I just read over that, and I know most of you (including me) are thinking, SHIT I DON'T CARE HOW I'M GOING TO DO IN THE FUTURE, WHAT MATTERS IS HOW I DO NOW. But seriously, just do your best, don't overthink everything, don't dwell on your bad marks or how shit you did in your trials; just have an optimistic outlook on life, and who knows, you might even suprise yourself. THEN you'll look back and think, "FUCK YOU ENGLISH DEPARTMENT, your shitty little trial papers don't mean shit!"

That's preeeeeetty much what's getting me through all this. From now on I'm going to forget about trials, and just focus on the things I CAN change.