It's an annual ritual in the Liu household to huddle around the newly received school photographs - it's like our unique version of family bonding. Let me tell you, this process takes place without fail every year;

1. The informer announces the arrival of the photographs (ie. me)

2. Parents instantly drop their pots and pans, leaving the lonely buckchoys searing away as they swarm towards the photos.

3. Gasp and condemn the overwhelming number of Asians in our grade and how Asians are infesting our land.

4. Scrutinize every individual in the grade whilst commenting on their appearances.

5. Add some snide remark about Murali being very tall and dark LOL (KIDDINGS BRO)

6. Eyes light up as they recognise Eric, yet agin. In context, this is executed in this ecstatic manner:

HEY THAT'S ERIC! =DDDDDDDDD *points at Eric and smiles proudly*

Yeah my parents perceive the act of knowing all my friends as a great achievement.

7. Gushes on about Trang as they are completely mesmerized by her beauty. TRANG, MY PARENTS TELL ME HOW PRETTY YOU ARE EVERY YEAR LOL.

8. Ask where Michael Lin is.

9. Ask where Jonathan Chan is.

10. Ask who is good at sport as they examine the innocent faces that are smiling back at them, evaluating whether appearance is an accurate reflection of athleticism.

11. Laugh at those smart people who fit the stereotypical "nerdy asian" appearance. I swear my dad is so cruel. I remember at last year's Recognition assembly, he laughed at some nerd who got the Maths award. =='

12. Criticise my gradual demotion towards the font row, sigh and shake their heads in disappointment as their hopes of having a tall daughter is crushed mercilessly.


--

SO 2010, ACCORDING TO MR & MRS LIU:

1. Trang is very pretty.

2. Josh and Jimmy look the same.

3. On second thoughts, Josh has a longer face.

4. Josh looks pretty good.

5. _______ has funny hair. *Explodes into laughter*

6. Daniel Goh looks pretty good. And wow his hair is very spiked.

7. Jono Chan looks sporty.

8. There are 12 non-Asians in our grade. (They actually counted)

9. ERIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (:

10. Rohan is very white for a curry.

11. Ewy looks different but maybe it's because of her hair.

12. Lynette looks very healthy and tank as always.

13. Damien looks like some gangsta from the Italian mafia. (until I told them that his glasses were transitions)


And more..



Oh yeah, I told my dad that Sajuna used to take photos of himself carrying a gun and wearing a balaclava, and now whenever he sees a picture of Sajuna he's like "HEY LOOK THAT'S THE TERRORIST!" Sorry Sajuna aha.

Tell me if your parents are accustomed to annual-school-photo-critiquing as well!




xx
Betty.