THE OAKES ROAD “ADVENTURE”
-- Pat Version (in other words the CORRECT version)

So there we were all sitting on the bottom oval after the A’s win. And in the distance I saw a person running at me. Yes, it was Tom. Now I started wondering why she was coming now as she usually waits in front of the TLC. Then she comes up and says, “Let’s go catch the TAFE bus to Epping!” Here is where I should have started THINKING. But no, without thought, I agreed to go along with her seeing as she wasn’t going to go by herself anyway. So we walk along the path out of the TAFE and across the road to the bus stop.

Looking like total lost tourists, we ask just about everyone there which bus goes to Epping. When we find out that we need to change busses at Oakes Road, I rethink this idea but with Tom’s persistent persuasion, I had to give in. So there we went, on 610 to Oakes Road and as we check the time, we’re very early which, apparently, was a good sign. At Oakes Road, we looked out to the long stretch of bus seats with happy faces thinking that we would be at Epping WAY before 36 got there then BOOM.

The realisation that Oakes Road was TOTALLY COMPLETELY EMPTY (except for one eager girl and one getting-frustrated girl next to her) had hit us. We checked the time and we were still very early. About 2:55 I think. And so we trudged up the bus stop and went to the bus timetable post and as my eyes scanned the timetable for the next bus….bus no. 611….pm…. THREE THIRTY TWO?!?!?!?! I simply turned around to Tom, who was still smiling, and glared.

So we sit down on those seats as all these cars rush past us on that deserted Oakes Road bus stop causing cyclone winds blowing at us and frostbite-causing coldness. I sit there trying to do Maths homework while Tom prances around like someone from the Pink Panther eating her egg and sprinkling egg shells everywhere like Hansel and Gretel. But may I remind you, WE CAN’T GET LOST BECAUSE THERE IS NO WHERE TO WALK TO ON A FREEWAY. Yes, we were only minutes away from Epping but NO there is no footpath and you can’t walk along the freeway. By the time the school bus gets here, we would have walked to Epping. And there. Our hopes of getting to Epping WAY earlier than usual are shattered as we hop on board 25 with people thinking we’re random tourists and arrive at Epping LATER than usual.

Moral of this story. Actually there are a few.
1. Once you hear Tom saying the words TAFE and bus in one sentence, run away as fast as you can screaming NO NO NO.
2. Don’t follow Tom when she says she knows how to get home early unless you yourself have checked up the timetable on the internet.
3. DO NOT catch a TAFE bus to Epping in the arvo under any circumstances no matter what your friends tell you.